The 50’s y/o something lady receipt checker at Wal-Mart: “Can I check your receipt sir?”

Me: “Of course, it’s in my back pocket” puffs butt in the air

Checker: hmm 🙂

Me: turns head back at her “I can’t reach it though”

Checker: blushes, smiles in disbelief

Me: “No, seriously, I haven’t been touched in three years…”

Checker: smirking Ur gonna get me in trouble 🙂

Me: “I’ll make it worth it”

Checker: blushing turnips lolol 🙂